Sanity or Patience: choose one.

Do you ever have one of those moments where you think, "HA! I am sane!" Then you step in dog poo with your bare feet and remember it was your idea to get the puppy...?

Tuesday, April 14

TAT: Another View from Band Camp

Tova's Totally Awkward Tuesdays are here again.... even if I am a tad late getting mine up today. I'm really wishing there were more awkward stories going up and linking to Tova here, as I'm sure I can't be the only person in bloggy-land willing to share his/her humiliation. Come on!

I was a freshman in high school, and it was band camp. Yes, seriously. I wasn't in the band, but the drill team was required to attend - and it wasn't overnight or anything, just every day for a year (or a week, whatever, it was awful) and it was miserably hot standing on the black pavement of our school parking lot marching who-can-remember-where. We took breaks now and then, and most of us drill team girls and a couple of my cool band friends (I'm serious, they were cool) would trot on over to the house next door and allow ourselves access to their trampoline while the owners weren't home.

One steamy day, I had on a little white jumper with wide legs, if you can call them "legs" as they came up nearest to my butt cheeks as any panty would have. What was my mother thinking letting me out of the house like that? Oh, that's right - I probably changed after she dropped me off. She was so lame.

So we were jumping, jumping, jumping... doing flips... cheer moves... lots of tumbling... a handful of peeps. I jumped up all willy-nilly in all my clumsiness and landed on my back/neck/head with my legs flailing about up in the air. Only nobody was paying any attention to my legs because (I might have neglected to mention that I wore a g-string most days back then - and no, I wasn't a floozy, I just didn't like panty lines) a handful of poor unsuspecting souls were subjected to a rather up close and personal view of my Australia.

Do you know how hard it is to get off your back when other people are still jumping? And do you know how hard it is for people who are jumping to just look away when they're trying not to step on you? Some of them were boys.

You may be asking yourselves at this point, "who hasn't seen her Australia?" I'm sticking to "innocent and naive" on all counts.

26 comments:

Emily from Mommin It Up said...

lots of band kids were cool. And band camp was awesome. For real. :)

Yaya said...

Oh boy, that is quite embarrassing!

Valerie said...

lol Sorry but that was so funny!

H F W said...

You probably made that summer at band camp the most memorable one ever for the boys on that trampoline!
I would post TATs but my situations are usually ridiculous or really stupid and not so much awkward. I'll have to think really hard about awkward ones for next Tuesday.

Musings of the Mrs. said...

Now I would probably laugh it off, but then, I would have DIED of humiliation. Poor thing.

Tova Darling said...

Hahahaha! Great story, and my favorite part is the phrase "my Australia."

Heather said...

98% of my friends were in band in high school (I was not, though I wished desperately I was), and they were all pretty cool. Of course we called ourselves dorks and wrote stories and songs about The Odyssey and Tale of Two Cities, so I guess being cool is all relative!

Donnetta said...

Heather said "Tale of Two Cities" Doesn't she know it's "Tail of Two Butts"?!?!

So, basically you are telling us the band dudes saw your hooha (to a degree)...

Are we SURE they were talking about MILFs in American Pie? I'm thinking it was RASs and they changed the name to keep you anonymous!!!

Gibby said...

This would be a perfect scene for American Pie..."this one time, in band camp.."

Hilarious!
I also love the Ponder This quote. So damn true. At least in my house.

Debbie said...

Now that is a funny story! Thanks for telling us all.

Kim said...

Oh my gosh, how embarrassing for you! I have never done anything humiliating like this in my entire life! :0)

I have never heard my area called Australia before. (Oh, I just got it! Down Under!) Boy, am I sharp, or what!

Sassy Britches said...

Don't worry, Kim. I didn't get it until you said it!

All I can do is shake my head and smile. I didn't even know what a g-string WAS until college!

P.S. I LOVED band, and I even was drill team for two years!

WhisperingWriter said...

Oh my gosh how embarrassing.

It sounds like something that would happen to me as my life seems to be full of awkwardness. Thankfully it seems like being Awkward is back in these days. I mean, in the movies they are always showing someone walking into a wall or a table (which I have done..) So, here's to being awkward!

Xazmin said...

Oh my gosh...could you be any funnier! I too was once a clothes sneaker/changer, because my mom was so lame too!

Xazmin

Funny in my mind said...

Floozy.
At least you had on panties.
We had cheerleaders who forgot to wear them.

Lora said...

oh wow...that's fantasticly awkward and funny all at once!

3 Bay B Chicks said...

I think "Australia" may very well be my new favorite reference. Hilariously funny. I don't think I have ever heard it used before. Definitely something from the dictionary of RAS.

I will try to use it again when I visit your blog! :)

-Francesca

Michelle said...

Wow! Um, yeah. Well, I'm at a loss for words.

Wow. yep. LOL

Snarky A. said...

"my Australia", you freaking slay me woman!
Hilarious TAT story! As always when it comes to you :)

joanofalltrades said...

Ryan Ashley says, "Um this one time, at band camp, I jumped on a trampoline with white pants and a gstring and all the boys saw my V-jay jay." No wonder you were so popular in school! LOL!

Amy said...

That is so funny. I guess the boys did like hanging out with you. Have a wonderful day.

Grand Pooba said...

Oh girl, that is awesome! Your australia? Where do you come up with these terms!

Great story I'm glad you didn't keep such a goody all to yourself! Ok, that sounded different then what I was going for. I'm not a perv I promise.

Crap, first I call you a porcelain doll like some freaky highschool kid and now I'm talking about your goody.

Oh man, I'm just digging myself deeper. I'm not a stalker I promise.

I'll leave now.

blueviolet@A Nut in a Nutshell said...

You are such a crack-up, you and your Australia! LMAO

Kathy B! said...

You know, if it wasn't so funny it would be embarassing! I have a number of those stories and inspite of the fact that I should be mortified I still LOL. This is one of those and you told it like a rock star!! Well done!

Jen said...

I love these stories of yours! Seriously they make me laugh out loud! I was in band and I totally remember those HOT days on the school black top! I even went to band camp, the overnight kind!! Yeah I am cool like that!!

Megan said...

Frickin hilarious! Seriously?! And your Australia? I have never heard a cooch <---my name for it, called an Australia! LMAO!!

You are obviously one of those people that does not block the bad things from your mind. I have to have people remind me of my awkwardness most of the time. LOL

*snickering*