Sanity or Patience: choose one.

Do you ever have one of those moments where you think, "HA! I am sane!" Then you step in dog poo with your bare feet and remember it was your idea to get the puppy...?

Thursday, April 4

Mean Girl Karma

What are the odds that the girl you tortured in high school would have a kid at the same time as you? Apparently, pretty good.

There were plenty of pros and cons we went back and forth with before we decided to send Monsoon to the same school in the same town that we grew up in. Him becoming best friends with children whose parents I physically and emotionally abused... well, that didn't come up in one single list. If it had, I'd have skedaddled across the state line and changed my name.

I'd like to thank Monsoon for the lessons I've learned in the past year+.

1. Hiding from the girl you tortured in high school is not an appropriate way to deal with the fact that your son is friends with her kid. You look like a creeper.

2. Pretending to talk on your phone to avoid awkward conversation with her (or lack thereof) while waiting on school to let out... is dumb. Your phone will ring. It just will.

3.  When you tell your kid he can't go to So-and-So's house because you have to wash your hair (every day for three weeks) does not discourage him from wanting to play with So-and-So. Probably he just figures you're an idiot.

4. Discussing your guilty feelings with your husband is unhelpful. "Wow babe, you were a _itch."

5. Hoping she doesn't remember you is unreasonable and highly unlikely. Even if she didn't, her new first impressions of you are "creeper" and "idiot."

So let me ask you this: How far does sharing a few bottles of wine and slobbering profuse apologies go toward convincing someone you're not that mean anymore?





4 comments:

Eva Gallant said...

That's a tough one. Lots of apologies may be necessary, and of course lots of wine--unless she's a teetotaler (non-drinker), in which case you may need to consider that move across state lines!

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