A Polar Affair

It's winter in Ohio, and you never know what you're gonna get. Just a couple years ago, I sent my son to school with not even a jacket because it was so warm - in February! But not today.


This year, we met Mr. Polar Vortex. He doesn't have many friends in these parts, but to be honest, I'm rather enjoying his company. Don't tell anyone, but I've invited him to stay a while. In fact, I can almost feel an affair brewing.


Believe me, I've never felt this way about any weather pattern before. I never expected to get caught up in snowy romantics, but when a situation presents itself at just the right time, well... sometimes that's when magic happens.


I love my husband. I do. But he can't compete with my new love. Mr.Vortex has the power to freeze air! I cannot fully describe what this gift means to me, but I'll try.


Layers of blankets and fuzzy socks. Snow days full of snuggling up with my boy and good read-together books. It's an excuse to not drive, because I'm a horrible winter drive (I hit a house, for goodness sake! I wreck every single time I try to drive on icy roads). It means fleece pajamas and a bathrobe! Which in turn means cookie dough, bean dip, pizza and potato chips, because I cannot feel how constricting my clothes have become. It means winter hats, so I don't even have to comb my hair (let alone dye it) and scarves that cover my face so there's no need for makeup. Boots! No uncomfortable dressy shoes. It's not having to get the dog groomed because she needs her fuzz to keep her warm. It means being free of guilt for not taking Monsoon for a bike ride or to the park. Actually, it's a freedom from guilt of almost any variety.


I've heard how affairs can ruin a person. When my Polar Vortex leaves me and the days become too warm for sweatpants, I'll try to unstick my jelly-rolled body from the electric blanket and move on. Maybe I'll even be able to use my bathing suit as an article of clothing again, instead of a napkin (not really - I dropped caramel on it last week, so I ate it. It was really good caramel).


Three cheers to winter. I'm dreading shorts season.