Sanity or Patience: choose one.

Do you ever have one of those moments where you think, "HA! I am sane!" Then you step in dog poo with your bare feet and remember it was your idea to get the puppy...?

Tuesday, May 26

Wanna hear something stupid?

Have you ever (oh, right - of course you haven't) done something so stupid that you still think, nearly a decade later, "Wow. That was really stupid." My husband did something several years ago that makes me think "wow that was stupid" every so often when I walk into our living room. (What? You thought you were going to read about something I did that was stupid? Bah!).

We came home one day and noticed an alarming number of bees buzzing around our front porch. Say ten or so. We went in through the garage to avoid them, then while hubs was putting away our stuff from the store, I went to the living room and pressed my nose to the big picture window in front of the porch.

Weird. The bees seemed to be coming from under the window. There's about a 6-inch piece of wall between the window and the floor. I lightly tapped my shoe against that piece of wall, and whatyaknow - a few more bees flew out. Ha! They're living in our wall. Hey, husband why don't you come over and see this? I tapped again, more bees came out. I laughed. Okay, yes, I wasn't being overly thoughtful here. But then my husband wants in on the action.

Ahaha! Stupid bees, living in a wall... let's piss 'em off some more! Tap-tap-tappety-tap- goes my shoe. TAP-TAP-BOOM goes husband's shoe... TAP-BOOM-BOO- Ack! We both heard a crack, looked down, stunned as we realized his foot had gone through the wall; we were frozen as they started crawling in over the toe of his shoe. Finally: Aaaaaahhhhhh!!! Picture me running in circles, flailing my arms, screaming like a banshee. Now replace my image with that of my very manly husband. Yes he did.

I think we ingested 3 bottles of various types of chemical killer that day. The bees died, but they put up a valiant fight.

He finally fixed the hole in the wall a couple of months ago.

23 comments:

H F W said...

That is horrifying ... and hilarious but only because it didn't happen here. Then it would have been deadly because I would have KILLED my husband. I'm terrified of bees and I have my own equally amusing dance if one ever approaches within, oh, twenty two feet of where I'm standing/sitting.

Morgan the Muse said...

That. Is. Epic. Oh my goodness!!! I am so glad I read this!

Kathy B! said...

If that happened in my house I'd be crying... but because I'm safely typing on my laptop with nary a bee in sight? HILARIOUS!!

Suzi said...

Tee hee hee! I guess dear ol hubby learned his lesson on kicking walls with bees behind them.

Julia said...

Oh my, HOW long did it take to get the hole fixed? Your husband is related to mine then since we have one open ditch, unfinished fencing, unfinished irrigation, AGGGH. I cant go on since I will start ranting too much about it.

But you two are kinda short a cent or two to kick at an active bee hive dontya think?? Hee hee. ;)

Michelle "Lady Bug" said...

Haha your stories crack me up. Wanna know something....
Ever since your post when you said Monsoon says earf instead of earth, my sister and I both say earf now instead of the actual word. Because I thought it was so cute and shared it with her. I love when kids pronounce words wrong, it comes out so cute. :)

Jingle said...

LOL! Good stuff! That is pretty darned hilarious!

Lesha said...

That would absolutely be something I'd do...
*shiver* creepy though!

Tova Darling said...

I would be so terrified!!!

The Cookie Girl said...

I can totally picture you in your dance! LOL I hate bees bugs anything of the sort.

BlueEyedWonder said...

tee hee....Now that was funny!

Jennifer said...

That would totally freak me out.

Debbie said...

Yikes! I'm glad you didn't get stung horribly.

RamblingMother said...

Oh, hee hee hee.

Michelle said...

Heh. I love it. Your poor husband. He'll never live it down, will he? But hey -- at least he (finally) fixed the wall, right?

Gibby said...

Wait, are you sure that wasn't my hubs that did that?

joanofalltrades said...

LOL! Had a similar incident with my hubs involving wasps and a grill. I can't believe he kicked a hole in the wall. I would have pissed my pants.

Grand Pooba said...

Yes, yes that was stupid. lol! I would have died! (But it is something I would do too!)

Sugar Boogers & Tantrums said...

LOL!! I can actually picture yall doing this. Good story!

Carey-Life in the Carpool Lane said...

Too funny! I can actually picture me...I mean, my husband doing that too!

A Cheap Chick said...

I love it! I bet you guys will still chuckle about that one when you have grandkids. :)

Sassy Britches said...

Oh. my. word. The wall just RECENTLY got fixed? Ahahahahaha! Now why is that funnier to me than the two of you running around in circles for dear life? Hmmmm...must rethink priorities.

Nikki said...

What an awesome story! lol