Sanity or Patience: choose one.

Do you ever have one of those moments where you think, "HA! I am sane!" Then you step in dog poo with your bare feet and remember it was your idea to get the puppy...?

Sunday, December 13

Why am I wearing a diaper, you ask?

Warning: if you do not find the humor in poop and/or vomit, you will likely not find this post enjoyable. You also likely do not spend much time with children.

Poor Monsoon. He came down the with the stomach flu right as I was calling him for dinner... at my parent's house. With my sister and her family. Oh yes. So many family members, so much vomit. It probably didn't help that as soon as he started it, I picked him up and ran him into the bathroom. We left quite a trail.

So now we're home. Husband has returned from two separate trips to the pharmacy, collecting first airborne for himself, and then Pedialite Popsicles for Monsoon. Before the second trip, however, Monsoon had an accident in his pants.

"Oops," he said. "When you have the stomach flu, sometimes you vomit out your butt?"

Yes. Yes you do.

Add pull-ups to the list, dear husband. The boy's gone without diapers for over 2 years, but it's night time. Likely he won't wake up and move to the bathroom in time. I am not cleaning that up again. Not today.

So when we pull them out of the package, Monsoon thinks we're joking. Husband, dear loving husband, promises that if Monsoon wears one, Mommy will put one on, too.

So I did.

It's over my underpants, of course, but still. It's under my pajamas. It's completely uncomfortable and I'm beginning to rethink the whole "old age" thing entirely. I am not cut out for diapers.

16 comments:

Hyacynth said...

Oh, poor little guy, but I'm completely LMBO!!!!!!!!!!!! You, dear friend, are one fabulous mommy for this. Take pictures please!?

Corinne Cunningham said...

I agree with Hyacynth. You are one awesome mommy!
Hope he feels better soon... and there isn't too much to clean up tomorrow.

Unknown said...

Aww bless his heart and yours for being such a great mom and letting him feel so not alone in that moment. My question is why didn't daddy up and volunteer his posterior since umm he is a guy too..

adrienzgirl said...

Oh, I promise you this, darling husband would SO be wearing one at my house if I was! :D

Hope Monsoon's boo-boo tummy feels better soon!

Funny in My Mind said...

Hey, sh*t happens. They wore diapers on Grey's Anatomy when they had a 17 hour surgery. It was hilarious!

Quixotic said...

ahh, the things we do. Good for you, and hope Monsoon is better soon.

Jules said...

what a good mommy you are! hope he feels better soon.

Michelle said...

Poor kiddo. I hope he feels better soon -- I love his perspective on it all. And congrats on moving into diapers -- be proud that it at least fit you!

Unknown said...

That is great! What a mom! Hope he feels better soon!

Unknown said...

Poor kid. I know how he feels! Hope we all kick this thing FAST.

Unknown said...

poor Monsoon!!! :( Way to be a trooper, especially having been volunteered for the job...

lemonologie said...

Too funny! I hope he is feeling better!

Thanks for visiting my blog the other week. Sorry the return visit has taken me so long!

love said...

Merry Christmas everyone. I love this time of year!

Julia said...

Laughing out loud funny. Thanks for putting a smile on my sick mommy face. :)

Grand Pooba said...

Ok Monsoon never ceases to surprise me with the things he says. Seriously, this kid is the best! I love that he said sometimes you vomit out your butt.

LOL and even more LOL for your diaper!

Unknown said...

Hi Sweetie!! Miss me? I missed you so I had to stop by and catch some of your antics and as usual, I was not disappointed! ROFLMAO! Vomit out of your butt? Classic! And oh, I must say that I hate you because you can fit into a child's pull up...just sayin'!