Sanity or Patience: choose one.

Do you ever have one of those moments where you think, "HA! I am sane!" Then you step in dog poo with your bare feet and remember it was your idea to get the puppy...?

Tuesday, January 12

The dog ate my pregnancy test

I share multiple addictions with millions of women across the world.

Chocolate? I can't remember a day when I haven't had chocolate.

Coffee? Some mornings, I feel like there aren't enough hours before bedtime for me to keep drinking the caffeinated warmth.

Hot showers? If we had invested in one of those endless water heaters instead of our small tank a few years back, I'd venture to guess our water bill would cost more than our house payment.

Pajamas? There must be more of us out there who could absolutely live in pajamas. I can't be the only woman to run to the grocery or pharmacy in them (they rarely look surprised when I do that).

Maybe they aren't addictions at all. Just creature comforts. Normal, justifiable, cozy comforts.

The other day, though, I realized I may have a problem that classifies in the complete opposite category than normal.

When Sprinkles took off with my home pregnancy test in her mouth, the primary thought in my head was "Eww, gross. That's got pee on it." Not "crap, now I don't know if I'm pregnant or not." Because honestly, I already know I'm not. It's a habit. Not a normal one, I'm fairly certain, but one that has been going on for a decade or so in our bathroom.

So on my list of improvements I want to make this year, avoiding the planned parenting aisle at the pharmacy is going at the top of the list. Not wearing my pajamas to the pharmacy, at this point, will have to wait.

17 comments:

C. Beth said...

Ha!! I like having a pregnancy test or two around, just for those months that I FEEL pregnant and maybe my (not so regular) cycle is a little later than expected. I used one last month though so I'm all out. Considering we have never, ever had an unplanned pregnancy (we're very careful) I'd be shocked if one of those things ever showed I was pregnant when we aren't trying to be.

DiPaola Momma said...

DUDE no WAY I actually stock pile them! Heck with 4 kids I'm obviously overly fertile and his boys have got great aim so I never trust that taking proper measures is any sort of insurance. I'm 36 minutes late and I'm in the powder room peeing on a stick. BUT at least I DON'T go out in public in my pjs that's just weird.. he he

Young Wife said...

I just couldn't resist when I saw this post's title. I understand. I've learned to just take a pregnancy test whenever I think I might be just so I don't worry about it.

singedwingangel said...

Well considering no preganancy test ever told me I was pregnant until I was about 5 months along they wre useless for me lol.. shoot with teh last one the blood test even said no and I was already 2 1/2 months.. now I am weird lol

Bombshell BLISS said...

Oh the joys of being menopause. Thanks so much for the reminder!

Grand Pooba said...

Wait, you mean you take a pregnancy test on a regular basis? FUN lol

Amy said...

funny story..

Eva Gallant said...

so glad I'm past the age!

Christie-The ChatterBox said...

You are pretty much the only person I know who could give that title to a blog post and it NOT be a metaphor! Well, maybe my sister (joan of all trades) but she doesn't have a dog...but somehow a dog would enter her life and do it! And this is why I love both of you :) Hang in there and remember a watched pot never boils!

j said...

you are not alone in the pajama dept or the pregnancy test buying addiction. i know plenty of friends who weened themselves off by shopping at the 99c store and then going cold turkey. i wish you strength to avoid that aisle in 2010, well or maybe not :+)

adrienzgirl said...

You crack me up woman. Stop with the preggers tests already! :D I might have a nervous breakdown if I needed one of those!

Working Mommy said...

Chocolate and coffee could be considered addictions...but jammies and hot showers are a way of life! Hopefully you had another test you could use - since the pooch stole your first one!

~WM

Michelle said...

I would love to live in my pajamas. Live is simply more peaceful when your comfortable.

Michelle said...

That makes me giggle. I do know people who do a pregnancy test every month actually... but I've taken exactly four (three in one day, one another day) in my life. Call me a coward, but I'd rather not know ;)

joanofalltrades said...

LOL! I was wondering how these addictions would lead you to talking about a pregnancy test. Yet, you still managed to bring the story around. Amazing!

Debbie said...

You are so funny! I can just picture the dog running away with the test!

Rachel Cotterill said...

I've never taken one... is that weird?