I should hate my job. Any sane person would.
I get puked on, peed on, pooped on... regularly. In fact, I've had to come home and immediately take a shower 3 of the last 10 work-days because there was vomit on me. Today, someone coughed up my nose. Although I'm almost thankful for that, because if I get sick and can't breathe out of my nose, I can't smell the diaper stink when I change them.
So I say again: I should hate my job.
I miss Monsoon all day long. When I first went back to work, he told the husband that he wished he didn't even have a mommy. That's right. If I couldn't be here all the time, why bother being here at all? Oh, the guilt. He told me recently that he loves me "this much" (hands spread about 6 inches apart), but if I quit my job, he'd love me "this much" (arms open wide). I think part of it stems from knowing that I'm spending my days with other children instead of him. He's the jealous type.
I should hate my job more than I hate doing dishes.
Oddly, I don't hate my job. Don't get me wrong - I'd be "at-home" again if presented with the opportunity, but when I'm there, I feel like there's a definitive purpose for me. Also, as challenging as they are, I love the kids. Every single one of them. Even when I want to run screaming from the building (and it happens often) I know I'll still be smiling the next time I walk in and see their faces. I didn't realize how much I missed teaching until I got back into the swing of it again.
Ask, Seek, Knock.
5 years ago
6 comments:
Aww hun nothing like guilt from your baby.. I so feel ya..
There is something very noble about teaching...I spent 17 years in the classroom and loved it. I didn't have to deal with vomit and diapers though! (I taught mostly high school seniors.)
Monsoon will eventually get used to you working. He will love you with arms wide open soon enough Momma!!
Glad you are enjoying working again.
BTW - I miss you!
Your little one will get used to it. Right now he might be mad, but kids are kids and they don't really make the connection all the time. It'll get easier!
~WM
Poor Monsoon. I bet he is feeling left out. What age range are you teaching?
Hope it's getting better and a routine is being established. I know that makes life easier around here.
Awwww...super sad that you have to leave Monsoon, but super happy that you're loving being back in there. Good thoughts coming your way for striking the balance you're hoping for.
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