Sanity or Patience: choose one.

Do you ever have one of those moments where you think, "HA! I am sane!" Then you step in dog poo with your bare feet and remember it was your idea to get the puppy...?

Tuesday, February 10

"I Just Sweat A Lot"

Visit Tova Darling for more Totally Awkward Tuesday shenanigans! You won't regret it... or maybe you will.

A long, long time ago, in an awkward land not so far away... I had two friends. No, I don't - I mean yes, I do still have 2 friends, but not so much these two friends anymore - this was over a decade ago, we were friends b/c our husbands were friends and I'm the only wife still standing. Sorry... I digress. You should know, however, that I didn't actually witness this awkwardness, but will never forget the story anyway.

These two... um... ladies, if you will; they went out clubbing on this night after an evening of whiskey with the men. Half way to the first bar, girl 1 (we'll call her Sweaty) said to girl 2 (she will be baloney), "I hafta pee!" Baloney didn't stop, probably because she didn't really like Sweaty and possibly also because it was apparently not that far.

By the time they got to the club, Sweaty didn't have to pee anymore. Mysterious.
When they got to the door and needed to pay, Baloney of course was not going to pay for Sweaty, so Sweaty had to dig in her pocket for cash. She handed the guy a wad of dripping (dripping!) bills. As he looked, horrified, from his wet money hand to the crotch of her pants, she told him, "Oh, I just sweat a lot."

10 comments:

A. said...

I can see why you would not EVER forget that story... Wow. That is crazy awkward, if not straight up nuts! :)

Yaya said...

O.M.G. no way!!!!!!!

The Cookie Girl said...

That is just Crazy...nuts...cookoo :)
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Tova Darling said...

Ewwww!!! That is so disgusting!!!

Ann's Rants said...

Grody. I loved "Mysterious..."

Bella@That damn expat said...

Ewww! That's nasty in more ways than I can count!

Mrs. Jelly Belly said...

OMG. Disgusting. Reminds me of when I was about 5 years old and spent the night at a friend's hous. Peed the bed. Blamed it on sweating. But I was a CHILD. LOL!

Ryan Ashley Scott@Optimistic Cynicism said...

Yes, it's disgusting - still glad I was still in the honeymoon stage of my marriage and decided to stay home with Hubby!

Megan said...

OMGOSH!! LMAO! That is SOOOOOOOO DISGUSTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hahahahahahaha

Beverly said...

OMGosh! how embarrassing. I had a boyfriend who's fraternity brother paid for breakfast with wet money after a night of drinking!! I wasn't there for that thank goodness!!