"I Just Sweat A Lot"

Visit Tova Darling for more Totally Awkward Tuesday shenanigans! You won't regret it... or maybe you will.

A long, long time ago, in an awkward land not so far away... I had two friends. No, I don't - I mean yes, I do still have 2 friends, but not so much these two friends anymore - this was over a decade ago, we were friends b/c our husbands were friends and I'm the only wife still standing. Sorry... I digress. You should know, however, that I didn't actually witness this awkwardness, but will never forget the story anyway.

These two... um... ladies, if you will; they went out clubbing on this night after an evening of whiskey with the men. Half way to the first bar, girl 1 (we'll call her Sweaty) said to girl 2 (she will be baloney), "I hafta pee!" Baloney didn't stop, probably because she didn't really like Sweaty and possibly also because it was apparently not that far.

By the time they got to the club, Sweaty didn't have to pee anymore. Mysterious.

When they got to the door and needed to pay, Baloney of course was not going to pay for Sweaty, so Sweaty had to dig in her pocket for cash. She handed the guy a wad of dripping (dripping!) bills. As he looked, horrified, from his wet money hand to the crotch of her pants, she told him, "Oh, I just sweat a lot."