Sanity or Patience: choose one.

Do you ever have one of those moments where you think, "HA! I am sane!" Then you step in dog poo with your bare feet and remember it was your idea to get the puppy...?

Thursday, August 4

Geographical Anatomy

How do you explain those parts to a 5 year old? How about a 4 year old? Three year old? Two?

When he was four, Monsoon got up-close and curious as a friend breast-fed her baby in our living room. I explained by way of comparing mommy's milk to cow's milk and he assumed that women have utters. Ahem. He might still call them that...

Most everyone I know has heard the story of the first time he watched me change my niece's diaper and very seriously asked, "Girls have two butts, Mommy?" It's one of my all-time favorites.

When it comes to naming a woman's nethers, no matter how many times he asks, I just can't bring myself to say it. I imagine every name I've heard of would sound vulgar coming from my preschooler. We could go with medical terminology, since he knows he's got a penis, but every time I think of saying "vagina," the scene from Kindergarten Cop plays out in my head.

I realize this has gotten out of hand. I've been deliberating far too long, and someone finally beat me to the punch. A girl at school today gave him his first official anatomy lesson, which he relayed to me at home.

"Hey Mommy? Boys have a penis and girls have a china."

4 comments:

Call Me Cate said...

As long as he realizes that China is a far away land he shouldn't visit for many years, that may work.

Unknown said...

OMG! I love it...I also love Cate's comment!

Tiff said...

LOL!!! Kids are awesome! You really should give that little girl at school a sticker or something!

DiPaola Momma said...

Or as it's known in our house the BAgina. Which when one considers our home includes not just toddlers but teen, it could be FAR worse. Miss ya sister!